How to cope with a negative appraisal

It's that time of year for many organizations - appraisal time. The very thought of it is enough to make most people feel like they're 10 years old again. But worse still, what if the appraisal throws up some negative feedback you weren't expecting.

There isn't one of us who likes to hear negative things about ourselves because I think fundamentally, we're all people pleasers. And why not?

So how do you cope with hearing things that sting? How do you not take it like a personal attack and how do you learn to accept it as constructive, address it and move on without being paranoid your boss doesn't like you? Here are some tips that may just help.

1. It's a 2 way street
Appraisals are not just for you to hear what your boss thinks but for your boss to hear how you're feeling. If the issue raised by your boss is one that you think can be explained, this is the time to be open and explain what you think might have happened. Bosses can't read minds and it's a wonderful opportunity for them to hear what's going on with you so don't waste it by thinking it won't matter anyway.

2. Be Positive
Rarely will you get a 100% bad appraisal and still be at your company. They'd have fired you a long time ago. If you have a couple of issues come up, then don't ignore all the other great things that have been recorded and look at the wider picture. Feel good about the things you have excelled at and the progress you have made at work and don't lose sight of this just because 2 things were less good. You're only cheating yourself.

3. Be Honest
Unless you have a genuinely unethical situation going on, your boss' feedback is probably relevant. before you fly off the handle and bitch to you co-workers about what's been said, think about it. have you been late maybe a few too many times? Have you been slow to hit deadlines? Have you made no sales when everyone else has succeeded despite the current climate? Have an honest moment with yourself and then vow to make it right.

4. Get Competitive
The way negative feedback has made you feel should encourage you to make sure you this doesn't happen to you again. Apply yourself fully and move forwards giving everything you can to make sure your boss is left impressed with your attitude. Don't ignore any issues that have been raised - make them history. If you see a deadline approaching that you can't make, let your boss know in advance with clear explanations. Raise your game and get competitive with yourself.